Last night was the first of a three part reunion spectacle in which the Beverly Hills housewives gathered to passive aggressively face this season's issues. A number of topics were brought up but the one that seemed far and away the height of bullshit was Lisa Vanderpump's innocent nickname for Adrienne Maloof's new shoe line. That Maloof woman seems to be richer than sin and fairly level headed so I wondered what she was doing on this show. Now I suppose we understand. It's so she can introduce a bullshit line of shoes. Shoes which, if you google them, are either complete Louboutin rip-offs or some kind of terrible Payless version of drag queens giving career-girl realness. So Lisa in one of those cutaway interview scenes referred to her shoe line as "The Maloof Hoof" which I think is pretty funny. But Adrienne certainly didn't. It's as though Lisa said Adrienne's children looked inbred. Lisa replied that that term was meant to be cute as though to say they were "fat little shoes." You could probably call that Maloof woman the c word and she wouldn't blink, but say "fat" and them's fightin words!
Fat? Fat! Fat?! FAT!!!!!!! Adrienne's head nearly exploded at that slanderous comment. Then Lisa attempted reasoning with Adrienne and tried pretending she liked her terrible shoes by saying she did want to purchase a pair in pink.
Pink? Pink! Pink?! Pink!!!!! According to Adrienne they were nude, not pink. It's as though Lisa had told her to fuck off on national television. HA! So in honor of Lisa Vanderpump, I give you The Maloof Hoof and yes, it's pink...... not nude.
Not sure if I have the stomach to weigh in on the other reunion shows as I'm saving all my love for those sun-damaged OC gals. Oh Vicki...... how I've missed drawing you.
The Maloof Hoof is drawn with pen on paper and colored in photoshop.
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