Hello there! Thanks to a lovely link from OC housewife Tamra Barney's blog, I know there's quite a few new people having a look at my site. Welcome! For those of you who are new here, I just want to take a quick moment and explain what's up. I've been at these opinion driven recaps accompanied with typically quickly drawn thingamajigs from the beginning of this whole franchise ..... One day, about four years ago, while innocently flipping thru the channels I came across a cosmetically-enhanced and slightly sun-damaged middle-aged Orange County woman droning on about some dull grievance. I hit pause on my tivo remote, did about a 5 minute drawing, and then posted it here. Ever since then, I've been doing 5 to 30 minute drawings of whichever person or persons grab my attention and well, now you're all caught up. Also, and I have to apologize, but I'm a little inconsistant here and there with my updates. There I said it. :) I've been away from home the last few days and I tried going on hulu to watch this week's episode and I couldn't find it. I was just on Bravo's website and there's only a couple super short clips which I watched as well as flipping thru the collection of still photos from Thursday's show. So.... I haven't seen the show but I'll chat about what I saw.....
First I'm just going to guess Alex fought with someone. Am I right? She's grown a pair of King Kong sized balls and nothing is going to slow her down. She's all sound and fury signifying a desire to be on next season and at this rate, I think it's guaranteed. She's taken on Sonja and Jill, and it's just a matter of time til she tramples over Luann, Kelly, Ramona, and the new lady. What's the new ladies name again? Anyway, the first clip I watched was Ramona's triumphant (?) return to the catwalk.
I have to hand it to Ramona for getting back up on the saddle. That previous runway definitely bucked her off ...... It's like Kelly going back to Scary Island with Bethenny. So the big question would be if Ramona could pull off a runway stroll that partially resembled something a model would do or would she again look like she'd been struck by lightning at a surprise birthday party? Well...... she didn't look quite as insane as before but she didn't look quite like the other models either. Maybe like someone pulled her hair and then stuck a finger in her nose. I did a quick doodle of supermodel Ramona and as I'm not at home, I couldn't scan it into my computer as I usually do. So I snapped a photo with my phone while taking the liberty of fingering her snout. :)
So the other video I watched was Kelly during what I gathered must have been a speed date, meaning she was on speed. Or valium. Or meth. Or coke. Or an entire Rite Aid shelf of cold medicine. The brief yet fully awkward clip showed Kelly with a guy who graduated from Juilliard so she thought he must be a dancer. No, he's an actor which meant Kelly wanted to know which instrument he played. Because most actors play drums, right? I think she was going to remain only 25% focused on the dates until she heard one say he's a pharmacist cause god knows she needs some sort of pill cocktail. I did a quick doodle of her and as I snapped it I had the wonderful vision of that Juilliard graduate sliding off his shoe, slipping outta his sock, and just before she asked him to reenact some scene from a movie she'd seen the night before, he'd press his sweaty, stinky, funky foot right in her face. Sadly she'd probably ask if he studied giving pedicures at Juilliard.
So that's all I know of what happened this week. As always, feel free to comment away below. Here's a quick tour of some of my illustrations from the previous seasons. Click to enlarge. Here goes....
Thanks!
I just found your site. WOW you are really talented. I'll be back!
Posted by: Ann Marie | April 23, 2011 at 08:49 AM
Same here, just found the site!! You are too funny and spot on with the comments :)
I LOVE your drawings!!!! You are really talented, they're absolutely amazing. Especially given the fact that you spend, at most, ~30 minutes!!!
Posted by: Stepha the Heffa | April 24, 2011 at 06:13 PM
Been a fan of the site for years - never commented but mainly observed and laughed and laughed and laughed... you are amazing :) yay for new traffic!
Posted by: Sharon | April 25, 2011 at 09:24 AM
LOL!!! great post as always, I wish someone would stick their foot in Alex's face, if someone did it to simon he would probably lick it.
Posted by: Bryan | April 25, 2011 at 11:37 AM
Did you miss the part where Sonya accused the young man at the wine tasting of staring at her decolletage? Then the camera zooms in on a disgusting wrinkly cleavage -- ewwww. Of course he was staring! It's a freak show.
Posted by: J M Cameron | April 27, 2011 at 05:09 PM
OMGAAAA! I just found your blog, thanks to RCH and her realitycrackhouse!!! I literally cried, laughing at your drawings of the housewives!!!! You are hysterical. Love it, keep it coming!
Posted by: Laurad54 | April 28, 2011 at 07:38 AM
I'm still waiting for you to give us some Sonja goodies. That woman has lost her mind this season. What a 180 she's done!
Posted by: Sweet Herald | May 06, 2011 at 03:06 PM
I prefer ATL and NJ Housewives, sorry!
Posted by: Whitney Spears | May 09, 2011 at 08:03 PM
okay....of all the "crazy" bee-otches" on these Real Housewives shows this one has it in the bag. Many of these gals, oh say, Ramona,Kelly, and of course Jill, sadly and truly shoulda starred in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's NEst. Really. It's not even (that) funny.
Posted by: LeeLee | May 27, 2011 at 06:27 PM
haha i just discovered this site and i'm absolutely in love with ur artistic renderings!
Posted by: aclineo | June 01, 2011 at 01:32 PM
I love your drawings. I absolutely can't stand the Cuntess or Jill [so fake] or KrazyKelly.
Posted by: u rule | June 17, 2011 at 07:49 PM
Great Stuff! You have amazing skills on how to draw.This is my first time visiting your blog and I laugh about your post.Thanks for sharing!
Posted by: v | July 06, 2011 at 02:18 AM
HAHAHAHAHA!!! I love your blog and art!Well done!!! Keep them coming! RHONY pretty much did me in this season-- I felt so sorry for Natalie Cole actually having to sing with said "Countess"-- I hope she got a PILE of money! That about did it for me, I'm swearing off RHONY for good....
Posted by: amorejohn | August 08, 2011 at 05:10 PM
It is completely silent in the office of the Magazine I work for. Finding your site at a time like this is going to get me in trouble. Can't...stop....laughing
Posted by: jess | October 24, 2011 at 01:41 PM