I consulted with Danielle's energist Sarai before starting this posting so I feel completely centered and focused right now. Love and light motherf**kers! Actually to use the proper energist term, she "scanned" me in order to help keep me balanced so that I can lead with love and at all costs to drive my message home in a very dignified way. Thank you very much. I also have an armed bodyguard standing over my laptop in case one of the Manzos tries to cyber-attack me. You know how those Manzos are. Danny and that sweaty, pitbull-faced, gum-chewing pal of his are waiting in a limo outside should I need someone to have my back. And I know it's a stretch but...... I have a few extra clip-on extensions handy should Ashley rip out a handful of my weave before I finish this. I follow her twitter and I know she's coming for me. I also heavily consulted a bottle of yummy cabernet before starting this posting so to quote Caroline Manzo--- "Buckle up!"
The Borgata Hotel, Casino, Spa, Tanning Salon, Waste Management Facility, and Insane Asylum was the site of this two part travisty. The gals minus Dina all came together under one roof for the first time in a year and it took just a few seconds for Teresa to come out swinging. Teresa's mouth was set on machine gun mode as: bitch, whore, disgusting, skank, and other similar slurs rapidly fired outta her mouth with Danielle being the target. I didn't quite get why Teresa had that f**king bonkers response to Danielle asking if she'd seen (?) talked to (?) acknowledged (?) her nephew but god did Teresa freak. I thought she was going to turn green like the hulk or that her hairline would lower all the way to the floor and look like Cousin It. Without a table nearby to flip over she lunged at Danielle with foam in her mouth screaming, "DO NOT BRING UP MY FAMILY!!!!!!" What an animal. Andy Cohen attempted calming Teresa but she pushed him down and continued her rant by beating her fake bubbies and throwing pillows and her own feces at the fleeing Danielle.
I've obtained a secret photo of Teresa and that nephew and here it is....
Ok, ok, that's really just Teresa and Joe. I think he looks kinda cute with one of those omnipresent therapeutic head wraps. :)
So I'm asking you----- what's this all about? Not just this particular episode or even the matriarch to matriarch face-off last week but really, what's up with this show? Did we learn anything from this super-sized, super-long season? I want to know why so many people, including myself, are paying attention to them. It's the train wreck factor, right? And why the hell am I asking so many questions instead of just taking it like a man? I need a cabernet refill. The season begin and ended much in the same way: Danielle was still crazy, Teresa and Joe wandered around that ridiculous McMansion and had yet another kid, Jacqueline did whatever she does, Caroline continues to speak in that strained voice and warns anyone within earshot to not mess with her family, and the wisest among them Dina--- well Dina split. I guess this season we were introduced to two of the undead residents of NJ, the Kims. Kim D and Kim G did provide some comic relief--- Tweedle D and Tweedle G were good additions after all. I've said it before and I'll say it again, there's nothing like new crazy. So off I go to consult with my bottle of cabernet...............
This is an aside, but speaking of new crazy--- I'm wondering if anyone gives a sh*t about the DC housewives? I thought the first episode was pretty lame and that's all I've watched. Is it worth it? Atlanta is coming back the beginning of October and I can not wait. NeNe, Kim, She Ree--- bring it!!!!
That's all for now. My apologies for disappearing for the last week and change. I had a project which took me away for a bit.