Please indulge me. Bewitched by the eyeshadow of my grocery gal.

I'll be the first to admit that the content of my blog is all over the place.  When this began some three plus years ago, my goal was to create celebrity caricatures documenting whatever the biggest story of the day was, and then hopefully to have those posted on the mega-blogs.  And you know what--- it worked.  My illustrations have been all over Perez Hilton, TMZ, Dlisted, Pink Is The New Blog, Oh La La Mag, Towleroad, as well as many, many others.  Forever grateful to the blogs who have and who continue to share my work.  Doing that kind of work was really fun for a time but eventually I got burnt out. This Britney illustration is a classic example and probably my personal favorite of that type of work.  To shake things up and renew my interest in blogging, I started recapping reality TV shows which I continue to love doing as well as here and there sharing personal stories in a category I titled Please Indulge Me.  It's unfortunately a category I've neglected lately.  Some of those postings have included: a story about a wedding dress I made for my cat, a guy with a bolt of Burberry fabric wrapped around his head I saw in the West Village, the female display mannequin I used to dress up when I was a kid, and a recap of the Mexican vacation my guy and I took. 

My interests are fluid and change which is why my blog is often times fairly scattered.  I love the Real Housewives of wherever, photos of hots guys in their underwear, a pinch of celebrity dish, and artwork.  It may be an awkward collision at times but that's me.  On with the posting......

There are four grocery stores within walking distance from my home.  The closest one is my least favorite so I only pop in about twice a month when I need some sunscreen or a last minute bottle (or three) of wine.  I've been going in all those stores for years so I'm familiar with most of the employees and am especially aware when there's someone new.  It was this past Halloween that I had popped into that close grocery store to grab God knows what- a makeup sponge, Aqua Net hair spray, bobby pins..... I usually get tapped to do friend's makeup and tame/ tease/ tweak a wig or two.  Most of the cashiers were dressed up in outfits that were easy to work in: a witch's hat and cape here and a drawn-on cat nose and whiskers there.  I spied a new cashier and just had to get in her line.

 

She was my height- 6', late forties, and her dense mane of silver hair was perfectly fashioned into a "That Girl" flip.  All that was well and good but her eyeshadow, HER EYESHADOW, was spellbinding!  Follow me..... The entire lid was bright red.  I'm talking fire engine red.  The cease was filled with a navy blue color which flowed seamlessly into an aqua hue eventually curving magically into a bright white patch below the brow.  And just to punch it up a bit- a smoky purple was feathered directly under the eye.  The rest of her makeup was surprisingly understated- subtle blush and a matted pale pink lip.  My grocery gal understands there shouldn't be too many exclamation points.  I studied her eyeshadow like I was going to have to replicate it in some design challenge for a Bravo program.  I was just about to ask what her costume was when I, fortunately, remembered my propensity for sticking my foot directly into my mouth.  Here's an example....

Years ago I worked in a trendy cafe in Hollywood which was stocked with an interesting array of customers.  One of my favorites was a really funny woman named Patti.  Patti, an especially fit gal, would come in everyday all done up and without fail she'd always make me laugh.  Strangely after coming in every single day- she went missing for about four months.  When she returned, ah, she returned with an extra 25 pounds attached to her stomach.  She strolled in without any makeup (uncharacteristic), her hair pulled back into a ponytail, and was wearing stretch leggings and what looked like a maternity top.  I thought it was a maternity top at least.  I ran up to her, looked at her tummy, gently hugged her, and asked how far along was she? 

Patti mock punched me and barked, "I'm not pregnant you asshole!  I just got f**king fat!"

We looked at each other in complete silence for five of the longest seconds I've ever known and then we both died laughing.  Ever since then I've tried really hard to not blurt out the first thing that comes to mind in situations like that.

So back in the grocery story line as I marveled at the flawless application of the most dazzling drag queen makeup I've ever seen on a non-drag queen, I had to say over and over in head don't mention the makeup, don't mention the makeup, don't mention the makeup.... And I thankfully didn't.  Just wished her a happy Halloween and was on my way.  I've been back in there a handful of times since that fateful day, have seen that grocery gal most of those visits, and you know what- that's just how she does her makeup.  It's the exact same every time.  Every freakin time!  Not the slightest change ever.  I've seen her there early in the morning, late into the evening, and it never changes.  Never.  As that's her work makeup- can you even imagine what her out on the town look would be? Oh the possibilities.......... 

Is there a moral to this little story?  Probably not other than my personal motto and it's a lyric from a Madonna song (could that be any gayer?) which is Beauty's Where You Find It.  Amen!  I found beauty around the eyes of my grocery gal.  It may seem like I'm poking fun at her but I'm really not.  I love seeing unexpected things.  I love that an innocent trip to the grocery has filled me with wonder and now I'm always looking at eye shadow application in a new and different way.  Thank you grocery gal and thanks to all of you for indulging me with this posting.

xoxo

Comments

[JBLynn]

There's a waitress at a restaurant where my friends and I go for breakfast who has makeup like that PLUS glitter on her face. Not once in a while -- all the time!

[Katie DeBona]

Isn't it so funny how people just get "stuck" in some phase or time period and cannot make the jump to current times? I am not sure what "phase" or time period your grocery gal is stuck in but it must sure have been when she was a teenager . . . to make such an impression she couldn't leave.

I must admit being a senior in high school in 1984 I just love big hair . . . I don't have it now but I do catch myself trying to style me hair that way sometimes...can't help it!!!

[Jill]

I always enjoy your blog...you have heart!

[trinity]

a strange choice of colors, like a flag!

[Angela]

Very funny babe...I can dig it. I like that!

Love ya and
Ciao Bella,

Angela

[LA]

LOL!! What a beauty...I wonder what her co-workers think of this gal?!? Come on people, say something to her....

[Blisterina]

@Katie DeBona & Trinity --

Maybe she got lucky one Fourth of July and never looked back?

Gilmore, we will indulge you anything. (And that Britney piece really is a classic.)

[Michele]

"And that's her work make-up ..." Really makes you wonder.

Anyway, a perfectly done flip should cover a multitude of sins.

The Britney illustration? I've seen that repeatedly but didn't know it was you.

I love your housewives stuff, but I'd love to read this blog on just about anything - really. The unique thing here is the voice and the pictures. You can't get either one anywhere else. Blog on Gilmore.

[Diane]

I was selling all of my "Omar the Tent-Maker" pregnancy dresses at a garage sale a while back. A rather hefty gal was looking them over and even tried on one over her clothes. I remarked how pretty she looked (!) and then chirpingly asked the dreaded "When are you DUE???" to which she sputtered at me the dreaded "I AM NOT PREGNANT!!!!" Then she bought all the dresses! heee! Awkward exchange of payment there...

So my rule is: Unless a woman is crowning in the dang delivery room, DO NOT ASK WHEN SHE IS DUE!! You just never know...haaaa!!!

[Pam Woodson]

Obviously inspired by Mimi !

[Jennifer]

Penny, Alexis's mom, looked like your favorite cashier. That make-up. YIKES!

[Blah]

I asked a DA if she was pregnant.

Twice.

I thought she hadn't heard me the first time.

In my defense she was really, really fleshy.

[dbr]

Love love love the Britney you did. Wouldn't you like to have a Jabba sized Britney. I bear her no ill will, she's on my top 5 mouskateers of all time.

From an inhumane, purely aesthetic point of view, I would like to see a huge Britney Spears waddling down rodeo drive eatin a popsickle.

[nancyaz]

Hilarious! You need your own show!