Look at me--- I'm posting on the same night as the show. Woo hoo! I have some Riedel wine glasses (pronounced like needle as my bff says) and one glass easily holds half a bottle of wine. I had two glasses tonight, so that makes me.... a drunk? I'll go with that. I downed a full glass half a bottle before starting tonight's Real Housewives of Orange County and then poured another the rest of the bottle as I sat down to watch the festivities. I know the bottle said Cabernet but I wondered if it had been switched with moonshine as my head was a blur trying to figure out what was going on with Vicki Gunvalson and her cruise ship? She has a three day Life With Vicki cruise and I couldn't figure out what the f**k I was looking at? Did she rent a cruise ship? Did she just think she was holding an insurance conference on a Carnival Cruise ship? What was going on? I was alone tonight so I knew no one had rufied me. ????? I guess she rented a conference room on-board the ship and held her Insurance selling meeting for what looked like eight people. In my haze I noticed this gorgeous person of questionable gender.......
..... and I grabbed my laptop, logged into my Orbitz.com account, and began searching Life With Vicki cruises. If that dazzling person is in attendance---- count me in! The camera naturally kept panning back to the person on the right and..... I tot I taw a tranny titty......
Hello Bravo!!!! Janet Jackson alert!!!
I feel so Perez drawing on my photos. I also felt like how Katie Couric must have when she was interviewing Sarah Palin. I just knew I was getting the score of the century. In my boozy haze I supposed Bravo's editors hadn't caught that lady's exposed boobie. Right when I was about to pull out my credit card and book a ticket on Vicki's next cruise, I realized that the lady was wearing a brown tank top. Bummer. The thrill was fun while it lasted.
I'll just say that my drawings are off tonight. My moonshine/ Cabernet blend seems to have adversely affected my skills. That said, here's Vicki of Life With Vicki having a stern conversation or should I say lecture at her son about attending all her insurance conferences. FUN!
I liked it as I was drawing it, but now doesn't so much resemble her. Hmmmm.... my pen must be broken.
Next there was Lynne. After last week when she didn't know: if she had air conditioning in her home, what she could put horse radish on, how to order a drink, and didn't know that she'd won at black jack even after she'd won---- this week she seemed not so ditsy. Mostly because they didn't show her too much. Unfortunately they showed her kids. Ugh--- it's the Paris Hilton dumbing down phenom in full glory. Here's Lynne wondering if the cigarettes in her daughter's car belonged to her daughter.
I think I captured Lynne's Steven Tyler-ish look here. Score one for me. Maybe Lynne should put a nanny cam in one of her wonder woman-ish bracelet cuffs and place that on the dashboard of her daughter's car? Just a thought.
Gretchen took her bangs and veneers to Dallas to hang with her old friends. I was about to fast forward through her section but I heard her say the following quote which stopped me cold in my TIVO tracks. "You put on your makeup, do your hair, and make yourself Pretty On The Outside..." She actually said the name of my blog! Thanks Gretchen for the mention. Much appreciated.
Jeana celebrated her birthday by going out on a date. We'll have to wait until next week's to be continued episode to get a look at the guy. I do wish happiness for Jeana. She's seemed so sad all this season.
Tamra went to visit her father. Her parents got divorced when she was 25 and then her dad married her mom's best friend. Let's all think about just how f**ked up that is. If my bff and my bf got together--- one bullet. That's all. One shot. One bullet. Consider yourselves warned bff and bf. Apparently Tamra's father's new wife didn't want him having a relationship with his kids, so a wall formed. It's weird watching such an emotional scene as the one that went down between Tamra and her father. It felt real as you could truly see all the emotions on Tamra's face. Well, as much as the botox would allow. You know I mean that with love Tamra! Here she is having that emotional encounter with her dad.
Wow that really doesn't look like her, but I was Naked Wasted by the time I got to this drawing. I'm surprised I was even able to draw at all by that point.
That's that. Next week is the finale and then the premier of New York Housewives. There was a sneak peak tonight and it looks goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood! Can't wait.
All photos were taken with my Canon Powershot.
Drawing were done in between 10 to 15 minutes with ink on paper.
Caberenet? Yes Moonshine? Perhaps.
Please click here for previous entries. Also check back later in the week as I'm working on a slide show feature with all my Real Housewives drawings. Thanks!
Also, please click here to see my illustration of the octuplet mom Nadya Suleman. Here's a sneak peak......